chinkL!GHTNiNG

i can't think of a title for this

2011-04-26T12:52:00.000-07:00

i don't feel awkward or weird...i feel bad. guilty. like i destroyed something innocent. something that was never bad. something that was always nothing but good to me.

i was just lying to myself, carelessly assuming it wasn't me and that i was just on the side and but i chose to ignore what was so obvious because i was too full of myself. i had my wonders and doubts but i never really said anything because i thought we were on the same page but looking back i realize that what i thought was contrary to reality and ~~maybe~~ for sure i was disillusioned all along.

i probably hurt you. i'm sorry. i'm worried. sorry for making you feel anything but happy. worried...that we'll become strangers again. i know everything bad that might or is going to or about to happen is my fault. most of all i'm afraid of hurting one of the closest friends i've ever had and damaging a good relationship.

i want to say something...i want to do something. i just don't know what. i wish i was good with these things...it's too soon to say, i know...but i don't want to lose you and how close we were...but it's not about me. i really don't want to, but if need be, i'll let you go if i have to. who knows.

i wish i had all the answers. stupid. but i wish i knew what to say or exactly how to act. i wanted to be the best friend i could be to you but now im sure i ended up being the exact opposite.

a good friend wouldn't have let this happen. you deserve ~~better.~~ the best.

now

2010-12-26T01:25:00.000-08:00

i want to cry.

just gonna say that

2010-12-23T01:50:00.000-08:00

just gonna say that...

tumblr > blogspot

i really want to say

2010-08-17T02:47:00.001-07:00

i really want to say how i feel like crap and im not in the mood.

dear estelle,

2010-06-06T03:29:00.000-07:00

i'll be your male counterpart.

thats right, fuck pip.

2010-06-06T03:28:00.000-07:00

that was a huge slap in the face
a big "fuck you"

i don't need this shit.

im out.

2010-06-06T03:16:00.001-07:00

i wanna know the answers
no more of this.
i wanna shut the door
and open up my mind

how do i feel?

2010-06-04T00:10:00.001-07:00

i could tell you how it feels to distract you from the answer.

i could tell you how it feels to see a gap form in between us.
i could tell you how it feels to seem to fade away.
i could tell you how it feels to think and try not to over think.
i could tell you how it feels to fail and over think anyways.
i could tell you how it feels to be suspicious but still naively trusting.
i could tell you how it feels to play stupid when you know things are dwindling away.
i could tell you how it feels to think you know the reason why everything is falling apart.
i could tell you how it feels to be so heinously wrong, and then paying the consequences for being so afraid.
i could tell you how it feels to have days not your own.
i could tell you how it feels to be washed away in thought.
i could tell you how it feels to seem like you never felt.

i could tell you how it feels to fall out of relevance.

too bad i wont tell you, because that would be irrelevant.

but i will say one thing: the worst feeling is thinking that it is probably your fault, but never really knowing. and that in itself, is your fault.
i think?

2010-06-03T14:03:00.001-07:00

those days i even said i dont know why im down and instead excused it as being tired, i realize it was the denial of my own feelings and even the miscommunication betweenthe emotional and physical.

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space

2010-05-25T22:27:00.000-07:00

some ignore it.
some don't.

some see it's limits.
some don't.

some understand it
some don't.

to infinity and beyond.
yet this feels like a rigid contract.

unfortunately

2010-05-12T22:49:00.000-07:00

i do not possess an infinite amount of patience. i do have a limit. i do wish. i do hope. i do hurt. i am human too.

but alas.

one wouldn't think so if had looked upon this tie so,
but think that the other heartless and one innocent
however none so great and both are lesser
and either guilty
none hast proven anything
to touch and connect.
a bond eclipsed by tears and hard nights
loosely threaded by hopes and clinging
memories of the past

oh the irony.
frailty, thy name is woman.
across the spans of the cerebral cortex
compassion of none is found
for those who seek to be lost
and find those who hope to be found.
a seeker?
but none lay among us
for victims they have made us all!
and now we lay in shadows as they creep
up our spines and spawn from the depths of our doubt
and feed from our fear and insecurities.
none more satire be scrutinized but still recognized,
all this troubles the mind and heart and soul, if you will.
for they all affect, the mind, heart and soul, if you will.

our emotions give us our humanity.

2010-05-12T22:31:00.000-07:00

it makes us rash, illogical and foolish.
be in touch, but don't let yourself controlled.
guilty.

my heart drops everyday.

2010-05-01T00:34:00.000-07:00

blip. blop. bloop.

ambiguity only leads to suspicion.

2010-04-30T23:19:00.000-07:00

i don't like it when people are vague...especially when i'm purposely trying to clarify something. to someone, to myself...for anything. it makes me wonder more, ask more questions, become more anxious. theres a time to be vague but being vague never helped clear anybody's name. i understand that there are boundaries and that somethings are clearly not my business. but that's not where i'm sticking my nose, so i want to at least know the truth. i hate it when people lie to me. i honestly can't stand it. even if you think something is a white lie, it can still come around and hurt somebody.
just be clear and honest with me, please. i want the whole truth and not some skirted, around about half truth. i dont understand whats so difficult about telling the truth if theres nothing to hide.
i'm not accusing anyone of anything, but im just frustrated that i can't get the whole truth when i know i deserve it.

i honestly

2010-04-29T23:59:00.000-07:00

don't need much to be happy. i'd honestly consider myself low maintenance?
its just...over and over.
i feel like a dog thats been waiting all day just to be thrown a bone. just a bone.

i need you to at least meet me half-way...

2010-04-29T23:57:00.001-07:00

this hurts a lot.

i think

2010-04-29T23:40:00.001-07:00

i've reached my capacity of making things better, not my limit to do more, but to any extent of effectiveness. im just old news by now. i'm routine and probably getting less interesting by the day.

not that i am unwilling, but rather inadequate.

i dont know.

deja vu.

i tell myself not to give up but i get no where and things stay the same.

i doubt that i am making you as happy as you deserve.

and i feel like i'm sure someone new will make you happier. i love your smile but it doesn't shine on me anymore.

i'm trying, i promise. i've been trying.

i'm sorry.

what the

2010-04-29T21:56:00.001-07:00

i hate that feeling where you know you should be able to trust someone but then at the same time something in your gut suspects that they have ulterior motives and crap.

idk. i think the whole situation makes me feel insignificant because well...just in case someone actually read this, nvm.

2010-04-21T01:43:00.001-07:00

if you truly care about someone, youll want them to be happy. you want them to be happy with you, but if they aren't, it'd be selfish to make them stay

i seriously have to say

2010-04-21T01:34:00.001-07:00

i seriously have to say to myself in my head "you're not a complete loser. God loves you. God loves you."

I am understood?

2010-04-20T23:17:00.001-07:00

You looked into my life and never stopped and you're thinking all my thoughts are so simple, but so beautiful and you recite my words right back to me before I even speak you let me know, I am understood

boring obnoxious.

2010-04-17T22:50:00.001-07:00

tired.

i like the post formatting on blogspot better thantumblr. but i like tumblr's home page/dashboard setup a lot more.

so tired...need more sleep.

2010-04-14T07:14:00.001-07:00

so tired...need more sleep.

i dont like being sick.

2010-03-21T21:12:00.001-07:00

i dont like being sick. i dont. blah...please take me home.

i hate it when people

2010-03-17T01:30:00.001-07:00

i hate it when people victimize themselves to subconciously avoid responsibility.

i dont know who im

2010-03-17T01:27:00.001-07:00

i dont know who im talking to. i just feel like ive been twisted and bent out of shape. i thought i could trust you to keep your word.

you were right

2010-02-24T00:20:00.000-08:00

vilg sa.

2010-02-11T00:31:00.001-08:00

[Baby] zapym kaiie cuhaim zybzesy cause you should be my lady unyah cekyh ketynoau uh hym tunypfyzfu hunyaky immesoauh eza hauhaih kaify boauhkcyahkaim rysggaryzou uhaine uze yhgenaim kainauga hy syaem pys keturyahhaihta

2010-02-09T19:19:00.001-08:00

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2010-02-09T19:14:00.000-08:00

ed'c hud ypuid sa. ed'c hajan ypuid sa. uv luinca hud, pid fro ec ed ymfyoc ypuid oui? syopa buccepmo fryd ev e ryt bnupmasc. ys e ajah ymmufat du ryja bnupmasc uv so ufh? frahajan e ryja so ecciac, oui vnayg yht tuh'd ihtancdyht, frah oui yllica sa uv hud ihtancdyhtehk un dnoehk du ihtancdyht.

2010-01-30T22:01:00.001-08:00

xD im so broke. and my parents are upset at me for that fact. i think ill have to isolate my wallet from the outside world and online shopping etc...gah. im screwed. i need to start saving up more. haha im so stupid.

2010-01-16T03:58:00.001-08:00

i feel like such a tool. i knew it. empty now too. dang.

2010-01-16T03:50:00.001-08:00

boundaries
i just need to sleep more...i cant function on this little sleep for so long. maybe some people can but i cant. i think we both just need the respect and understanding necessary period. if genuine, then things should turn out better.

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2010-01-14T14:44:00.001-08:00

i just dont know what

2010-01-02T02:35:00.001-08:00

i just dont know what to think...things seem so different, and im being pushed away more everyday.

i feel so small and

2010-01-01T05:20:00.001-08:00

i feel so small and tiny and insignificant and minisculey important.

FWD:

2009-12-28T20:11:00.001-08:00

mwahhr

2009-12-23T01:28:00.001-08:00

a couple of things i got...

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what i was given in the white elephant gift exchange

2009-12-05T21:44:00.001-08:00

2009-11-24T08:01:00.001-08:00

:] my hat should be like this.

2009-11-21T18:09:00.001-08:00

bored at work...like always.

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i wonder if anyone checks

2009-11-20T12:37:00.001-08:00

i wonder if anyone checks this anymore :p oh weel

shes the best <3

2009-11-15T16:33:00.001-08:00

2009-11-06T19:57:00.001-08:00

my dad got me BR31 :D got new york cheesecake

2009-11-03T02:23:00.001-08:00

2009-11-01T01:33:00.001-07:00

2009-11-01T00:12:00.001-07:00

to yumyum...

defeating lance of the elite 4 in art class.

2009-10-28T08:01:00.001-07:00

2009-10-27T15:04:00.001-07:00

life skills...waiting for the bell.

2009-10-27T08:03:00.001-07:00

dolewhip!! and em. haha

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because its my blog.

2009-10-26T21:17:00.000-07:00

i love acting like im cool [:

2009-10-26T21:00:00.001-07:00

2009-10-22T15:11:00.001-07:00

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2009-10-22T14:09:00.001-07:00

2009-10-21T10:45:00.001-07:00

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2009-10-18T22:42:00.001-07:00

2009-09-27T02:38:00.001-07:00

and you're missing...<3

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2009-09-27T02:34:00.001-07:00

and when im alone upstairs this is when i lay and dream about you.

and a little afraid to...? :]

2009-09-21T17:08:00.000-07:00

2009-09-20T14:39:00.001-07:00

on the way to the baptisms

2009-09-19T23:53:00.001-07:00

2009-09-19T23:44:00.001-07:00

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2009-09-19T23:39:00.001-07:00

i have unlimited text so

2009-09-13T16:27:00.001-07:00

i have unlimited text so i will abuse this fact because i am frustrated. dont want to do my slaughterhouse 5 essay. fugg...shouldve read it. dang

2009-09-09T22:01:00.000-07:00

that’s God (top left) chillin on a cloud (dragon ball z nimbus style). and thats me (center) being held back and separated by sin (all the black scribbly stuff). And although im separated from him, His unfailing love shines down on me and i am able to have a relationship with him, believing his son died to take my punishment of death for my sins, linking the separation caused by my iniquities.

this is a picture i drew at redwood camp this summer. my cabin leader, derek wong told all of us to draw God…and i really didn’t know what to draw. and i know he obviously doesn’t look like that, but this is what i could produce in 3 minutes. because i knew a literal picture would be impossible, i chose to use symbolism…

little wonders

2009-09-09T18:07:00.001-07:00

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frozen yogurt just met a funny person in line @ costco

2009-09-08T16:01:00.001-07:00

the last nights of insomnia...aka summer.

2009-09-08T03:01:00.001-07:00

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2009-09-08T02:57:00.001-07:00

2009-09-08T02:52:00.001-07:00

jotting/feeling blue

2009-09-08T02:48:00.001-07:00

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2009-09-08T02:44:00.001-07:00

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2009-09-08T02:40:00.001-07:00

2009-09-08T02:14:00.001-07:00

from cabin lois @ pcjc

2009-09-08T02:12:00.001-07:00

2009-09-08T01:12:00.001-07:00

i moved...

2009-08-25T18:23:00.001-07:00

to tumblr!!!

got kind of fed up with blogger and moved to tumblr.

yayaaa...!!

different blog, same chinkLIGHTNING

just lovely.

2009-08-25T00:13:00.000-07:00

i failed at adjusting the friggin thing but oh well. sigh
the forehead is too white! but it still made me laugh.

blogspot has been ticking me off and being all PMS ishh...thinking of switching to tumblr or wordpress or something. gah but blogspot is getting annoying. especially when uploading pictures and stuff. this stupid text window that im writing in is fuggin 3 inches tall...maybe not even! oh, and i can't blog on itouch...either that or i cant figure it out >< fail. gahhhh. anyways.

*mutters under breath "freakinn blogspot."

tumblr? wordpress? livejournal? ... i deleted my xanga long ago...

hoopes i did it again.

2009-08-24T22:41:00.000-07:00

me: what's up dude?

you: im getting kind of bored

me: let's get some food and then hit movies 4

you: what's going on?

me: what's up with all our friends?

you: let's start a rumor just to find out where it ends

cause a small town is like a small stage for teenagers and their drama instead of playing shows, we'll be showing plays. like 90210 without the beverly hills

---------------------------------

when i met w/my brother today, we ended on this note:

1 Thesselonians 5:16-18
¹⁶Be joyful always; ¹⁷pray continually; ¹⁸give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

am i understood?

2009-08-24T17:09:00.000-07:00

sometimes I'm so thankful for Your loyalty. You love regardless of the mistakes I make will spoil me. My confidence is, in a sense, a gift you've given me and I'm satisfied to realize You're all i'll ever need

You looked into my life and never stopped and You're thinking all my thoughts are so simple, but so beautiful. and then You recite my words right back to me before i even speak You let me know, I am understood.

thank You for blessing me.

i am understood

graphiks

2009-08-24T13:56:00.000-07:00

dear blog,

im feeling very self critical today. today's mood is kind of depressing. my tongue is burning from hot chili sauce + yumcha. today/last night's word was "festival" ... we'll see what happens.

love, steven.

you caught me off guard. i had very minimal to no expectations. i thought i was to become a mere memory to you and that what we little we had would be insignificant and ephemeral. kind of like a shopping receipt to the candy you just bought at the store. a reminder of what was done. what was spent. but in the end, just a negligible reminder of an insignificant event in ones life.
i didn't think id ever see you again. i didn't think you wanted me to.
but i was wrong, so here we are now [:

-----------------------------------

you like to think you're never wrong. you have to act like you're someone. you want someone to hurt like you. you like to think you're never wrong. you try to take the best of me, go away.

i was thinking
over thinking
cause there's just too many scenarios
to analayze
look in my eyes
cause you're my dream please come true

i was thinking
over thinking
about exactly how i'm not exactly him
i'll break my heart in two
more times than you could ever do
cause you're my dream please come true

i was sinking
lower, sinking
cause i lost the things i held on to
they let me think a thought
a thought that i would know was not
of seeing my dream come true

i was thinking
over thinking
about how far i had let this go
one more guy/girl chiché
i know now you're just in the way
of me and my dream come true

yes...yes it does heal. but its never the same again.

...but thats good.

photograph pictchaa

schizo.

2009-08-24T13:19:00.000-07:00

i can feel it. i can touch it. i can taste it.

why
because i shouldn't.

i can't feel it. i shouldn't touch it. i dont know.

...not again.

*punches self

i dont want to be dangerous to you.

im sorry that i feel this way sometimes

-----------------------------------------

i want to see this.

adam sandler is awesome.

this calls for some happier tunes :D

2009-08-24T02:14:00.000-07:00

im happy [:

'tis a good night.

God has blessed.

Here In Your Arms

actually, this is more what im thinking though. gah what WAS i thinking.

oh well.

this IS the now.

She ain't for me, you're the one I need

She was model chick, pretty thick, in them jeans
Working at the Storm, 25th, Excuse me
Can I tell u what my name is?
You look like the kinda girl I wanna get with
She asked what kinda car I drive
I said the V12, all white with the chromes, and keep the details
And I thought she was the one for me
to please her I started actin differently
And when I met u
I thought I could be myself
You showed me lovin like nobody else
I never had to ask for nothing
with her it seems like it was always something
Now I know the choice that I should have made, shudda bin with u what else can I say
So wud u be with me
Il be yours eternally

She may have what I want
But your the one I need, I need
She may look like them girls in the videos
But your the one for me
I used to think she was so fly
and If u asked me why im with her I cudnt tell u why, oh no
It so clear to see, you’re the one I need

You told me before, I didn’t listen
Said that she was playing round, I wudnt pay attention
I tried to make it look as if we was doin fine
I didn’t wna tell myself, I wasted so much time
Now I know the choice that I should have made, shudda bin with u what else can I say,
so will u be with me
Il be yours eternally

She may have what I want
But your the one I need, I need
She may look like them girls in the videos
But your the one for me
I used to think she was so fly
But If u asked me why im with her I cudnt tell u why, no no
It so clear to see, you’re the one I need

From the bottom of my heart
I will make a change
I swear I wont put no1 else before u this time
Wanna make a brand new start
So please don’t walk away
Im not in love with her
And all that really matters is you, is you, is you

She may have what I want, girl you’re the one I need
Girl its not for me

She may have what I want
But your the one I need, your the one I need
She may look like them girls in the videos
But your the one for me
I used to think she was so fly
If u asked me why im with her I cudnt tell u why, cudnt tel u why
It so clear to see, you're the one I need

She may have what I want
But your the one I need, your the one I need
She may look like them girls in the videos
But your the one for me
I used to think she was so fly
If u asked me why im with her I cudnt tell u why,
It so clear to see, you're the one I need

...a lot of those lyrics are so wrong, but im too lazy to change them.

www.lyriczz.com ftl

sometimes i try to just be a big fish in a little pond...but sometimes not even.

*sigh...?

i like to...

2009-08-24T00:38:00.000-07:00

imagine things like a movie.

via nom nom

a suspenseful thriller
an epic action film
a touching inspiration
a tragic love story

i try not to be too cheesy.

am i the only one who does this? loll

visionary...no, fail ><

U.nited S.tates

2009-08-23T15:19:00.000-07:00

another late happy night.
30 songs accompanied by a reason.

Download the song playlist i made for ms yumyum

and can you tell me if the link works downloading the .zip file? thanks!

about to go out to a family dinner...yay for dinner. boo for long chinese family get togethers and blabbering old people. *sigh. or maybe im just a bit grumpy right now...i needs some shleeep *yawn

time to throw on some shizades and rock it to dinner

fin.

i was totally emo over this song

2009-08-23T00:06:00.000-07:00

...like a little over a year ago

although, the music video seems happy ish. so...conflict of emotion when watching it. lol

one of the few country songs i really really enjoy

over 400 plays

*sighs

GAH DAH FRAH WAH BLAH.

2009-08-22T23:23:00.000-07:00

i swear i couldnt see it until they got up really close to the car...

hehe. fun fun?

i hope you didnt die of a heart attack.

2009-08-22T23:01:00.000-07:00

funny. haha kid cudi you weirdo.

1: can i get some popcorn?

................

1: AHH what are you doing!?

2: oh i thought you said "can i get some cop porn"

sikkk thoughts.

2009-08-22T21:09:00.001-07:00

gahhhh. you dont own me. get away. youre nothing to me anymore.
i dont want you to be anything. i dont care anymore.

we used to care so much. i cared about you so much.

because i cant for both
my and your own sake.

be gone.

2009-08-22T14:48:00.001-07:00

quite frankly, im excited for it. a year, huh? that a long time i guess...its crazy when i think about it but those are a thing of the past now. simply just distant memories and new things and lessons i learned tucked into the back of my head. although those times hold the most emotional pain, i wouldnt change it for the sake of everything i learned and was showed. id like to think everythings okay now...and it is in a way, but definitely not the way either of us ever expected it to be. i think, though, thats a good thing. but in a way, its a good thing i didnt know that from the beginning...i dont even know if that makes sense. thank you, God.

even though i know its highly unlikely, i have this feeling like we'll run into each other someday years from now...randomly and unexpectedly, experiencing a bitter sweet kind of moment... like in the movies. *sighs

anyways, away from the over dramatization, and back to possible reality.

today seems to be going by fairly quick. hope i can go to the bonfuego today...

you used to be my girl

but now you're just

My Girl

2009-08-22T11:24:00.000-07:00

good morning, world.
currently in: boxers.

weeeeeee.

..........

I love the smell of your perfume
I love those sexy clothes you wear
And every little things you do
Just make me wanna be with you

And I still can’t wait to hold you girl
And I still want you here in my world

Don’t have to worry about those tears falling down from your eyes
Don’t have to worry about no secrets I won’t tell you lies
Don’t have to be ashamed just tell me girl what’s deep inside
No I won’t ever let it go I’ll make it alright

..........

i talk to myself and inanimate objects when its late at night, and early in the morning.

morning breathe. lovely

blogging like a madman

2009-08-22T04:16:00.000-07:00

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

its 4am and i should be in bed or something...actually no
because judging on my recent sleeping pattern, the night is still young!

uhm.
its funny because
past a certain point in time at night
i start to become delirious
and i forget things the next morning
and i sometimes hallucinate
and oh well.
its fun :D

wait wtheck was i just talking about? frickk it

i hope i can find a ride to the bonfuego tomorrow...frick ill be late...and idk
but i wanna go but no ride and relatives coming over later tomorrow and cleaning room will be crap because the dad guy who i dont even know is going to be staying with me in my room and my room is a mess i bet that if you threw a grenade into my room, the end result would be cleanerrr idk what im saying weeeee.

*cracked out

*dead

Another day is going by
I'm thinking about you all the time
But you're out there
And I'm here waiting

And I wrote this letter in my head
Cuz so many things were left unsaid
But now you're gone
And I can't think straight

This could be the one last chance
To make you understand

I'd do anything
Just to hold you in my arms
To try to make you laugh
Cuz somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
Just to fall asleep with you
Will you remember me?
Cuz I know
I won't forget you

Together we broke all the rules
Dreaming of dropping out of school
And leave this place
To never come back

So now maybe after all these years
If you miss me have no fear
I'll be here
I'll be waiting

This could be the one last chance to make you understand
And I just can't let you leave me once again

I'd do anything
Just to hold you in my arms
To try to make you laugh
Cuz somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
Just to fall asleep with you
Will you remember me?
Cuz I know
I won't forget you

I close my eyes
And all I see is you
I close my eyes
I try to sleep
I can't forget you
Nanana (....)
And I'd do anything for you
Nanana (....)

I'd do anything
Just to hold you in my arms
To try to make you laugh
Cuz somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
Just to fall asleep with you
Will you remember me?
Cuz I know
I won't forget you

I'd do anything
To fall asleep with you
I'd do anything
There's nothing I won't do
I'd do anything
To fall asleep with you
I'd do anything
Cuz I know
I won't forget you

2009-08-22T04:01:00.000-07:00

duckfat fries.
never had em, but just LOOk at them.
they must taste amazing.

*dips in sauce and NOMs

i talk a lot =x

2009-08-22T03:47:00.000-07:00

Me:dang dont u get hungry too
Me: staying up this late
Lindsey: haha of course i do
Lindsey: im eatting right now
Me: pwaha
Me: sweet
Lindsey: reall unhealthy tho
Me: yeah
Me: true statement...
Lindsey:are you a meal person
Lindsey:or snack person
Me: both
Me: lol
Lindsey:hahah!
Me: i love
Me: potato
Me: chips
Me: xD
Lindsey:how come you arent a fat blob then?
Me: i am
Me: im a fat blob who thinks hes fairly skinny...ish.
Me: mind over matter
Me: i make my body not fat with my mind

no explanation necessary.

2009-08-22T03:25:00.001-07:00

2009-08-22T03:05:00.001-07:00

PWAHAHA. what is this!??!

me and lindsey were talking about when we googled chinkLIGHTNING and apparently i was a ranked twitter updater in california but then...twitter destroyed 3000 of my updates. and now i have less than 500 ]:

*sighs. this is funny and sad at the same time.

*scrolls through pages.

the end.

2009-08-22T02:50:00.001-07:00

soholyromances: im playing with markers too
chinklightning: sweetness
chinklightning: this is a sharpie
chinklightning: im starting to get delirious

but fuggggg. i have to finish reading that AND pride and prejudice AND slaughter house 5...gah way to screw myself with procrastination.

2009-08-22T02:43:00.001-07:00

i watched little kids run around the house while their parents went out to a magic show with mine.

i made chicken parmigiana + bowtie pasta and garlic bread using hot dog buns. it actually was pretty good. anyways, with a lot of help from nuoli who...is in hawaii right now. but we were communicating via video chat/meebo

to mr grannucki,

i love you bro homo.

------------------------------------

the only reason i go outside at this time of night is to go pee.

wtfreak

fricka frack.

2009-08-22T00:46:00.001-07:00

i dont know why you act like you still like me. its been like what...3 years? and all that drama with ******** ?? wtheck was that. totally unnecessary. i doubt you even like me because you dont even know me, and i dont know you anymore, either. im sorry but i just didnt see the point of that and this. i was going no where and you weren't either. wtf wtf. you confuse and frustrate me. dizaanngg it. *shakes head i need space.

*sigh.

on a separate and random note:

i REALLYYY hate it when people play the racist card.

don't give me that "its just because im (insert minority race here)" crap.
because i'll give you "no actually its because you're being an idiot"

and another random though—

dude. kurt billoups i miss you no homo.

its—its the remix b-a-by!

2009-08-21T20:44:00.000-07:00

Friday 5
1. i feel like throwing up right now

2. i feel hot and its night time. gross

3. oblivious people make me angry. DIEEE

4. i like to cook pasta. yumm

5. blowfish sushi is something i must try before i die. me & nom nom together

DID I STUTTER !!?!?

i waited and waited...

for nothing...