SUPERuseless SUPERpowers

Laser Pointer Vision
Your gaze isn't strong enough to burn through anything, just strong enough to point things out. Makes prolonged eye contact particularly awkward and painful during romantic dinners and job interviews.

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In-flight flight.

Being able to soar through the air still won't save you from recycled oxygen and endless stories from complete strangers. Known as the "Cabin Sparrow," this so-called power lets you fly, but only within the confines of an airplane. At least you can leapfrog the beverage cart when explosive diarrhea strikes at 30,000 feet.

(via superuseless.blogspot)


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i need to pee now.

uhm...

我 爱 佼 字 ！！！！

the dangerous thing about them is that once i start eating them, i dont stop. theyre like sexy bundled up into a convenient...little...gyoza of awesome. idk! but theyre so yum...

and i want!




。。。。WAIT. i just realized that i already had dinner. NOOoooo. stupid diet.
FoAWK im hungry ]:
i should probably just look for fruit or something.